Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Lessons in Motherhood - Cherish the Crazy Moments

Work is crazy! Pull my hair out or it will fall out on it's own kind of crazy right now! As I was sitting in my chair this morning trying to get some work done Elizabeth crawled over to me and climbed up my chair and started doing some high pitched singing. It quickly turned into I'm angry cries and I want you to hold me mom. I was in the middle of something though and I got frustrated and I lost my cool (I hate to admit it). I yelled at my precious almost 9 month old daughter who knows know other way to communicate than through crying. I felt guilty for yelling so as I moved my laptop out of the way and scooped up Elizabeth I said "It sure would be nice to have some peace and quiet for a minute." And as soon as I said the words my heart got heavy and I started to apologize.

I would rather have my ears hurt from my daughter screaming than have to deal with the heartache of her being gone. On Sunday a speaker in our ward at church shared a part of a conference talk that touched my heart when I first heard it and again on Sunday.
 
“One night our little son Richard, who had a heart problem, awoke crying. … Normally my wife always got up to take care of a crying baby, but this time I said, ‘I’ll take care of him.’
“Because of his problem, when he began to cry, his little heart would pound very rapidly. He would throw up and soil the bed clothing. That night I held him very close to try to calm his racing heart and stop his crying as I changed his clothes and put on new bedsheets. I held him until he went to sleep. I didn’t know then that just a few months later he would pass away. I will always remember holding him in my arms in the middle of that night.” (First Observe, Then Serve)
 
As I wished I could recall the words I had just said I was reminded of this story and how precious life is and we never know when will be the last time we hug or hold our children...say I love you, hide under a blanket together, fall asleep together watching TV.
 
So my lesson in motherhood today is that we need to cherish the moments with our children even when they are driving us crazy. They are young and innocent children who just want our attention. And no matter how crazy my work is my children are always more important even though the pressure put on me sometimes makes me think otherwise. I'm so grateful to be a mom and to have children to care for and messes to clean up and owies to comfort.
 
How did the morning end you might ask? I held Elizabeth for maybe 5 minutes and nursed her and she fell asleep. She was asking for just a little bit of my time.